Moving Forward

Posted on Fri Aug 7th, 2026 @ 8:27am by Lieutenant Commander Tate Sullivan Ph.D. & Captain Joshua Young [Taylor]

Mission: Season 6: Episode 7: Crossroads of Destiny
Location: Counselor's Office
3029 words - 6.1 OF Standard Post Measure

It was time for Josh's next session with Tate and the first one after their 'disagreement' He understood her reasons for not wanting to date him but that didn't mean he agreed with it. He felt she could have at least given them a chance but Tate didn't share that point of view so the idea died without ever getting a fair shot.

He walked to her office, told the receptionist he was here for his appointment and took a seat in one of the chairs. He sincerely hoped they could remain friends and that their dust up hadn't placed any unnecessary strain on their relationship. he silently sighed, he would find out soon enough.

As Tate made her way from her office to the reception area to greet Josh and take him back to her office as she had done many times before, Tate was also apprehensive. While she was confident she had made the right decision about dating Josh, she also knew she had hurt him by turning him down, and there was still a possibility. He would decide he no longer wanted her to be his counselor. Of course, she would understand if that ultimately was the case,, and she had not ruled out the possibility he was just coming to tell her that very thing, but it would still be a source of sadness for her.

Entering the reception area, she spotted him and offered what she hoped he would see as her usual smile. “Hi Josh. Are you ready to come on back?“

Josh rose as Tate approached him. He picked up her apprehension instantly in her body language though she was doing a good job masking it. It radiated off of her. "Hello Counselor. I am ready." He replied guardedly but not unkindly or coldly. As moved to follow Tate back to her office. Yet inwardly he still debated whether he had made the right choice in continuing to see Tate. He sighed silently and decided to just see how the session went and go from there. *Maybe she's having second thoughts about dating me* He thought and suddenly stopped pursuing that line of thought. Tate had made her decision clear and he wasn't going to beat a dead horse by going on about it.

As was usually the case, it didn't take either of them long to settle in comfortable chairs opposite one another. Taking a moment to consider her words, she decided to keep things simple. "So how've you been since our last chat?"

Sitting across from Tate, Josh's eyes were fixed on hers. He took a moment before replying. Her turning him down on a date still hurt but he realized she didn't do it to hurt him. She was better than that and he was lucky she was his counselor. "I'm okay Tate. Just taking things as they come. You know one day at a time. Not getting ahead of myself."

Tate nodded, taking a beat or two before offering, “For what it’s worth, I don’t think you got ahead of yourself the last time we talked. I think it shows tremendous progress on your part that you were so forthcoming about your feelings and what you wanted. I know it didn’t go the way you wanted, but I keep thinking about the man you were when you first walked into this office. That guy couldn’t even conceive of wanting to connect with another person romantically, let alone ask anyone else out.“

Josh was quiet as Tate spoke about the progress he had made since first coming to see her. When she had finished he replied. "Any progress I have made is due to your skill Tate and I thank you for the compliment but I think you are just being nice." He paused, it hurt to hear her say it didn't go the way he wanted but he tried not to let it show. Instead he said. "No, it didn't go the way I would have liked." He admitted, However I'm still seeing you."

“I think you give yourself too little credit for how far you’ve come,” Tate replied. “Is it difficult for you to see a difference in yourself from where you started?”

"I don't see what you see Tate and that isn't giving myself too little credit. That is just being honest. I think and know I've made progress due to your skill and patience. Just not here." Josh replied evenly.

“Not where?“ Tate asked. She knew Josh was being sincere in his compliments, but she also knew she had to see them for more than just kindness. If he was making her primarily responsible for his successes in therapy, it meant he still did not believe in himself. A less experienced therapist might have gotten caught up in the flattery of his words, but looking beyond that, she had to be concerned about whether she was fostering an unhealthy dependency, which was only exacerbated by his confession of his feelings for her.

Josh resisted sighing, rolling his eyes or making any dramatic gestures at Tate's question. He took a deep breath before replying. "In this particular situation of me asking you out, I just don't see where it took a lot of courage or confidence to ask." He replied honestly. "That's all."

“It takes courage to face any situation in which the outcome is not guaranteed,” Tate replied. “As I said, the Josh I first met, could never dream of thinking of another person in romantic terms, much less asking another person out on a date. If not progress, can you at least see you have changed between then and now?“

Josh considered what Tate said and he could see her and she was right, When he first came to see her he was consumed with loss over Anna's death and while he still missed her terribly he was able to think and do ither things. The loss wasn't as crippling as it was a few months ago. "Alright, I concede your point. I have changed and made progress."

Tate heard the words but couldn't help but wonder if the concession was more begrudging than agreeable. "Is it just me, or does this feel more like a standoff rather than cause for pride? I'm not saying there isn't more work to do, but talk to me. What's on your chest?"

Josh leaned back in his chair and looked at Tate, his eyes on hers.*Okay," He thought *Cards on thable.* "I don't think it is a standoff Tate, not at all. " He paused and took a deep breath, "This hurts. I don't mean talking to you, I mean being rejected. My mind understands and accepts your reasons but my heart is still having a tough time accepting what you said and it doesn't ease the pain. It is just going to take time to work past it." Then he continued, "I still want to continue our sessions."

“ Good,” Tate replied with an affirming nod. “I want us to continue talking too and I will agree with you that getting through these feelings does require work, so how about we start the actual work by exploring the thoughts behind the hurt? You’ve said you’re in pain. That’s your heart’s message. What is your brain saying? What is the voice inside your mind saying to you when you think about the hurt you feel? Also, I think it might help to focus on the Tate you know that was your therapist before she was anything else to you. Talk to that Tate, the one who was your teammate in meeting challenges.“

Josh thought what the question Tate had thrown at him and for a few anxious seconds he was at a loss and then it came to him. "My brain is saying 'Put on your big boy pants and get over it. Quit feeling sorry for yourself. You weren't the only one affected by the decision and you have a lot to be thankful for. Explore other options. This isn't all about you." Josh leaned forward as he finished, " That's what my mind's voice is saying to me. You are still my teammate Tate. of course another voice is trying to tell me to think about what to have for dinner." The last said with a smile gracing his features.

Tate laughed, relating to the dinner question more than he knew. "What to have for dinner is one of the more difficult questions to answer in life. I've been more decisive in boarding actions," she joked before turning her attention back to Josh. "So, it sounds like the problem isn't just you feel hurt, it's that you're beating yourself for feeling hurt at all. It's hard to recover from a disappointment if our attitude is one in which you tell yourself you're someone less than you should be just for feeling it at all. I wonder, if we accept your premise you aren't wearing your big boy pants, what does that say to you about who you are?"

Josh grinned at Tate's laugh and it slowly faded as he thought on what she had said. "Maybe it means there is still a lot of work for me to do and that I am still searching for myself. I'm a marine, proud of it. I know what to do, how to act in military situations. It is as natural as breathing but this...." he gestured about the office "Is hard, Anna was much better at the social graces and I don't mean when to say please or thank you. Its about fitting in."

Tate nodded, impressed with Josh's level of reflection. "So being turned down and daring to feel hurt by it doesn't just mean disappointment in your mind, it's an indication you don't fit in, don't know what to do, and fail to have social grace?"

"It means that I feel I have work that still needs to be done. Like I said, it feels awkward, like I am lacking, I don't do small talk or gossip. I ask and answer questions. So, if I am at social functions, I nod my head and smile a lot."

"So being turned down for a date means you're not good enough and are lacking social skills," Tate surmised aloud. "Is that the only possible explanation for why you were turned down?" Tate knew Josh understood it was not at all the reason she gave him, but the key was getting him to actively practice applying logic when the circumstances made him more vulnerable to giving in to emotional reasoning. Only practice could help him challenge the idea that something feeling true was enough to make it actually so.

Josh looked at Tate, he knew what she was doing and why. She wanted him to take a closer look at himself, to explore all possible explanations. "You know it isn't." Josh replied with a smile. It's just marines by and far don't have much experience in social functions. Oh, we have marine functions but those are different. it's all marines so no problem fitting in. I guess I need to force myself to get out more and mingle huh?" He asked already knowing the answer.

Ever the man of action, Tate could appreciate Josh wanted to get to the solution, but experience had taught Tate the real gems were in helping people understand the connection between thoughts and feelings. The answer wasn't merely to find the right action to take, it was also about taking control of what to think. "That could be something to explore," Tate offered, "but before you jump to the next step, I think it's worth focusing on what you specifically said to yourself about being turned down that caused you to feel so hurt? If it's true marines struggle socially in general except among other marines, isn't that just a neutral fact? Combat isn't a strength for most counselors either, but if I felt hurt or even angry because I was rejected as a participant in a combat course, I suppose the question would be, 'What am I making the rejection say about me, Tate, rather than any old counselor?"

"Well, most counselors aren't trained to be in combat. " Josh countered and continued. "As to what I said to myself, I asked myself why was I turned down? Where was I lacking? As I mentioned earlier, I hadn't stopped to consider the reasons you gave. I was looking at it as a purely personal matter and felt I had to be lacking somewhere. I know now that was the wrong track to take but it was how I felt at the time. Only after you revealed your reasons did I take a step back and evaluate my thought process." Josh remarked with a wry smile.

Now they were getting somewhere. “I’m glad you were able to take a step back and examine the evidence for your thoughts, and I also think it’s good to really examine what those thoughts were even before examining the evidence you have. I noticed you described your thoughts at the time as containing questions, but it sounds like there were some not so hidden statements there. Questions can have a variety of answers, including that there was nothing wrong with you at all, but you’re right. When we are upset, our questions can feel like they have obvious answers.“

Josh nodded, "Questions also make us take a look at ourselves and to be honest in what we see as well as what needs to be worked on and corrected. After all, Shakespeare said, "To thine own self be true." If we can't be true with ourselves who can we be honest with?" He asked. As he sat and waited for her reply, he had to admit these sessions with Tate had helped him. Helped him get a better overall view of himself and that was abonus anyway you looked at it.

“Well said,“ Tate replied. She had to admit, she wasn’t sure how things were going to go when the session started. but for the first time since their last challenging session, Tate believed not only could they move past it, but perhaps their therapeutic alliance would be stronger for it. “In that spirit, shall we talk about what you’d like to do next to take the next step in your healing process? I’d like to hear more about your ideas.“

"Now, that is an excellent question." Josh replied with an honest smile. "I'll have to give it some serious thought. however I am open to any suggestions you might have in mind." His eyes going to hers as he waited for any ideas or suggestions she might have even as he thought on the question she had posed.

"Well, you mentioned something earlier about getting out more to mingle. What does that look like to you? Where and how feels doable?"

Josh didn't rush an answer, he wanted to think on the question Tate posed. After several moments he spoke. "It looks like going to a bar or lounge or any social function and just hanging out. See how others act. You know baby steps, crawl before you walk, walk before you run."

“Is there a particular time and place that feels like a good place to start? It’s OK if you want to avoid certain places and times to start with to avoid creating pressure for yourself.“

Josh nodded at Tate's observation. "Good point. I think the lounge is better than the bar and I think it best to go in the off hours like between lunch and dinner or even after dinner where there are less people and it isn't as hectic."

"That sounds like a good plan, so when do you think you'd be willing to give this a try?"

Josh laughed at Tate's question, it was rich and full of good humor. "Now, that is truly an excellent question and let me be absolutely clear in my reply. I have no idea." As he chuckled again.

Tate eyes sparkled with mischieviousness as though she were a cat that had just swallowed a canary. "Ah ha!" she exclaimed with a flourish. "I've discovered the flaw in your master plan. Would you like to try that answer again?"

Josh's eyes were still full of good humor. "I guess the correct answer is to say the sooner the better and before our next session because i know you'll want all the details. Right?" His eyes sparkling with delight.

“Exactly,” Tate replied. “I only chose this profession so I could get regular access to the latest happenings in people’s lives.“

Josh laughed and his eyes were alight with joy, "I thought so! You can't put anything past me counselor! Well, you can but I'll figure it out eventually." He replied before laughing again.

“Of that, I have no doubt,“ Tate replied. Sensing they had come to a natural stopping place for now, Tate offered, “Speaking of next session, should we plan the same time next week?“

"Sure, if isn't broken don't fix it. This time works good for us. No reason to change it." Josh observed.

The reference to something not being broken further cemented Tate’s confidence their therapeutic relationship was back on track. Perhaps it wasn’t what it was before, but that was OK with Sullivan. It was a start. “Sounds great.“

Josh stood. "Indeed it does. I will see you in a week and give you all the juicy details because I know you'll want them." He finished with a chuckle. He turned and started to leave before stopping and looking back at Tate. "Thank you Counselor." He said simply and it wasn't a thank you so much for this session but for Tate's remarkable patience with him and offering quiet support every step of the way.

"You're most welcome," Tate replied sincerely, understanding in that moment he was expressing gratitude for more than just today's talk just as he hoped he understood her response was equally sincere.